9 Reasons Why Some AFRICAN Ladies End Up Single For Life

1. Many African ladies will end up singles for life because of media exposure - it is so disheartening how a lady will glue her eyes on a mobile phone from morning to night, only to raise it up to focus on television to watch another celebrity entertainment channel. Tell, what else will dominate this lady’s mindset aside how to live a fake celebrity life being promoted on television channels?

2. Many African ladies now dislike cooking and home chores just because they had been totally brainwashed by movies showcasing men playing the role of women in a family, and due to excessive exposure to modern media that promotes gender-equality in a destructive way that’s aimed at destroying the unique African family setting that made our previous African marriages everlasting and envious to the westerns. Now, with this attitude, how do you expect a African man to desire to marry when he knows he is only buying more headache and trouble than helper for himself?

3. Excessive makeup turns most decent and serious-minded men off- if you have observed, you will discover that most men dislike excessive makeup, and more don’t even like it at all; reason they often times discourage their true loved ones to do away with it cos it speaks ill of a lady even though so many men will applaud and complement you for looking like an Egyptian mummy. A slight makeup is okay; but if you are out for marriage, try always to look simple and natural, it will attract better men, decent and serious-minded, except you are still living in your high school life and not thinking towards marriage.

4. Stop Giving Your Number Out To Every Joystick & Harry! No man would want to propose marriage to a lady whose phone is always talking and laughing with unserious calls. You may not be a playgirl, but he would judge you as one, and will likely flee at the slightest chance or disagreement.

5. You Don’t Bring Any Value Into The Life Of Men You Date or Are Dating- because your best friend married without contributing anything to the man that finally married her, doesn’t mean it will work for you that way. Think, work towards equipping yourself so that you can be a value and also add value to his life to convince him that you are worth committing to. Adding value to his life isn’t by giving him money, or material gifts, nope….good counsels, being his best friend, helping him attain his goals in life, lending him moral, mental and spiritual support, and by not just being a liability that only bring requests and problems to be solved.

6. Your Friends Run Your Life- how do you expect to find a husband when you still allow your clique of friends to be dictating which man you meet is worthy of your love and which is not? When will you wake up and face the fact that those your best friends even though they cherish you, wouldn’t want you to marry before them or to marry the best man?

7. You Give Everything Out During Dating- As a single lady who has not been taken to the altar, you need to reserve some things for your husband to be, especially your body, respect it and preserve it at all cost. In the past, men rushed to marry to get certain things or privileges they had been constantly denied while being single. Such privileges include and not limited to: constant s*x and companionship, good food and tidied home, etc. But today, a single man gets even the best and of course more of constant s*x, good food and excellent home-keeping more than his married counterparts, so tell me how the hell you want him to desire to marry you when you have given him virtually everything he desires from a wife while being his girlfriend? And the most painful part of it all is that he knows that you are prepared to cut down on s*x supply, cooking, home-keeping, etc once he marries you, so why would he not want you to remain his girlfriend for life?

8. You Package Yourself Wrongly- in your attempt to look sexy, adorable and maybe appealing to guys, you have derailed from appealing to appalling. In fact you look more whorish than modest; more distractive than attractive, and more disgusting than adorable. Your dressing style determines who gets attracted to you most times. If you dress high school, only high school-thinking guys will be attracted to you, and if you dress excessively sexy and provocative, only randy men will come to you for urgent satisfaction of their immediate s*x urge, so don’t be fooled by media hyping of certain kinds of dressing, they are meant for certain set of ladies you wouldn’t like to be associated with, be careful. Remember, not all clothes that look sexy are good for a seriously searching for a soul mate single lady.

9. You Lack Manner, Character, Wisdom and Good Home Upbringing- definitely, your ‘hot girl’, ‘pretty girl’, ‘sexy girl’ looks will win you so many men; both the good, and the bad, but your inner beauty, your character and manner are the things that will determine whether any of those men would stay or run after accomplishing their evil missions. In order words, do away with nagging, being possessive, challenging with men in negative ways, the mentality of ‘what a man can do a woman can do better’, a lie devil has used to deceive and destroy so many ladies today, please do away with it.

Are you dating a player?

By Dustin Goot

Ever had that feeling that the guy you’re dating might be too good to be true? As in, he’s so handsome, charming, and amazingly romantic that you’re wondering whether he’s pulling the same moves on various gals all the while wooing you?Nancy Kalish, Ph.D., a psychology professor who has researched and written about lost loves, has observed this phenomenon so many times among her female patients that she decided to get to the bottom of it. Over 18 months of study and interviews, Dr. Kalish found that philanderers share a startling number of characteristics. Know what those red flags are, and your play-dar will be right on target. So, here are five warning signs to watch for — as well as five signs the guy you’re seeing is an upstanding, sincere sort that you should consider keeping around.

5 signs you could have a player on your hands…

He’s bold. For the player, the pickup is a game. He doesn’t approach women with the same nerves or awkwardness of a normal guy. He’ll walk up confidently, with a big smile and great eye contact. His manner will be smooth and put-together. This doesn’t mean you should look for the opposite — a stuttering wreck — but be wary of a guy who acts completely bulletproof. A little anxiety is natural.

declares his feelings right away. Players employ a “fast come-on,” according to Dr. Kalish, making sweeping statements of affection (e.g., “You’re the most perfect woman I’ve ever met”) from the word go. These declarations can feel very welcome, especially if you’ve been in a string of relationships that lacked such intimacy. Just remember that true closeness takes time, and it’s normal for a guy to be more guarded about his emotions.

He always plans romantic dates. Dating for the player is kind of a performance art. And he’s going to be good at it. “He won’t just bring a box of chocolates,” Dr. Kalish warns. “He’ll take you to a state fair and offer to share cotton candy.” Nice guys can be romantic, too, but life with them won’t always feel like a Robert Pattinson movie. Nonstop rooftop picnics and weekends at the cottage could be too much.

He has lots of acquaintances, no close friends. The player tends to be a lone wolf. That doesn’t mean he lacks for golfing buddies. The same way he charms women, he can charm lots of people in his life. The key is that, in friendship as in romance, his affections run broad but not deep. If solid pals are hard to come by with this guy, consider yourself warned.

He’s a thrill-seeker. A guy who spends his spare time looking for a rush — fast driving, bungee jumping, kite-boarding, heli-skiing — should give you pause. This type, says Dr. Kalish, craves the excitement that comes from conquering a difficult challenge, and that goes for his relationship goals as well. Once he’s “conquered” you, your allure may quickly fade.

…And 5 signs he’s just a nice, upstanding guy

He’s goofy. The sincere suitor is not suave. He doesn’t always say the right thing. It may sound weird to go into a date hoping for a pratfall, but it’s not a bad thing. “Believe me,” Dr. Kalish says. “The false charmer does not trip. He knows where his feet are at all times.”

He remembers personal details and events. It’s the most basic way to show someone you care — by learning about his or her life and interests. Players can’t be bothered with this. One of the most common complaints Dr. Kalish fielded about false charmers was that they failed to show up at important events. “They are narcissists,” she says. “Dating is all about them.” Trifling as it sounds, if a guy remembers to bring over your favorite ice cream or shows up at your pal’s birthday party, he might just be a keeper.

He treats his mama right. Generally speaking, a loving family begets a loving person, and the opposite is also true. Dr. Kalish often heard about dysfunction in the families of insincere boyfriends. While this might incite an understandable desire for you to reach out and help, you should also be cautious. The wounded outcast who is betrayed by his parents makes a hot lead in a soap, but not the best boyfriend. Try the good-hearted guy who flies home for his mom’s birthday instead.

He can mingle. “The sincere guy doesn’t mind being in a room with people who are more accomplished than he is,” Dr. Kalish says. Conversely, the player wants to be in situations that will glorify only himself, especially around his woman. He doesn’t want to listen to another man’s interesting story. A loving guy, on the other hand, can mix with others even when he’s not the star of the show, and actually enjoys learning things from them.

He says, “I love you.” As fawning as a player’s affections are, there’s still something sacred about the L-bomb. Dr. Kalish found that insincere men would say, “I want to grow old with you,” or “I want to have children with you,” but “I love you” remained somehow off limits. A guy who says those three magic words may very well mean them

10 reasons you shouldn’t date

Did you ever hear the saying, “Pain in life is inevitable, but misery is optional?” Applied to dating, avoiding misery typically means staying away from toxic people. You know the kind I’m talking about: people who are selfish, vain, perpetually victimized, materialistic, harsh, shallow, bitter…the list of negative attributes goes on and on. (Of course, there are toxic men and women, so this is an equal-opportunity list, divided into two sets of five.)

Related: 6 bad reasons to date someone

If you’re a guy, how can you get a leg up (so to speak) on avoiding toxicity in your dating life? First, consider the five female archetypes I’ve outlined below. From being overly materialistic to clingy to just plain nitpicky, these women will likely become the iceberg to your Titanic, sinking all possible romantic joy quicker than you can hum the film’s “My Heart Will Go On” theme song by Celine Dion. The only things that should go “on” are your feet walking out the door if you encounter any of these female terrors, so watch out… you’ve been warned!

Five toxic female archetypes for men to avoid:

1. The Material Girl. She’s all about the money, honey. She’s checking out your car, level of professional success, and bank account before — and in all likelihood, instead of — seeing and appreciating the real you on dates. If you don’t escape her soon, you’ll start to feel like the most important parts of you are found in your wallet and/or bank account. It’s a dehumanizing experience to date this kind of woman, so why bother?

2. The Queen of Dependence. This lady is usually attractive, sweet, and open (yes, those are her good qualities). But she can’t make up her mind about what to have for dinner, let alone take a stand on making more important decisions in her life. From the minute the two of you meet, she’s leaning on you for advice and answers to every trivial question she encounters. She wants you to be crowned “King of All Her Choices,” but ruling over that kingdom gets old really, really fast. Next thing you know, you’re bored with doing all the mental work of managing her life for her… and then wondering why you feel so disengaged.

3. Ms. Criti-catastrophe. This woman’s got what professionals call an “overly developed critical super-ego.” In layman’s terms, she’s a nitpicker extraordinaire. It’s the way you drive, style your hair and clothes, the guys you hang out with, the seats you grab at the movie… nothing you do will ever be quite right, in her opinion. The first thing to go after a few dates with her is your self-esteem. Clearly, you’re already a failure in her eyes — and if you don’t look away from her judgmental gaze pretty fast, you’ll see your own reflection there and internalize her damaging opinions as if they were your own.

Related: Is she the wrong woman for you?

4. The Bitter Girl. This woman is quick to let you know that everything sucks, and she’s so mistreated by everyone. (You could also call her Miss Lemony Snicket, since her life seems to be a never-ending series of unfortunate events.) However, you didn’t cause Bitter Girl’s troubles — and you can’t cure them, either. In fact, you’ll be her next excuse for why things are going so horribly wrong in her life. Your real nightmare begins when you start to feel a little like Lemony Snicket yourself, and your once-positive nature gets overwhelmed by her perpetually gloomy outlook and daily dose of misery.

5. Miss Demeanor. She might have a mighty fine look and smile, but she’s also got quite a demeanor to go with those assets… and here’s what I mean by this: “da nicer you are, da meaner she is.” Her harsh attitude makes a pretty poor impression on others when you’re out in public. Oh sure, when you’re alone together she can be fun and pleasant enough. But put her in a situation where she’s not the star of the show and she becomes cranky, outwardly irritable, and has no interest in integrating into your life when you’re clearly just a bit player in hers. The longer you’re with her, the quieter you’ll become, lest you risk unleashing the beast (e.g., her mouth, shrieking one of her infamous tirades).

Related: 10 signs your date isn’t The One

But these ladies aren’t the only ones wreaking havoc on their dates; there are plenty of toxic men out there, too. So how does a woman know which ones to avoid in the dating world? Perhaps it’s a guy who’s so cheap that you feel like you’re on a date with a human cash register — his conversational skills are dull enough to put you to sleep if not for his occasional “ringing,” which reminds you with alarming regularity exactly how much everything costs, how expensive certain things are, and what you each owe when the bill arrives. Maybe it’s someone who considers controlling others to be a contact sport that he must win, no matter what. Or is it the kind of man who’s forever lovelorn, weighed down with way too much baggage for even your toned arms to carry any meaningful distance? Watch out for these five types of men who (in comparison to being stuck with them for a partner) make staying single for life look highly appealing…

Five toxic male archetypes for women to avoid:

1. Peter Pan. At first, you’re confused; he’s over 30 and (physically, at least) looks his age. And yet, there’s something about him that reads “college dorm” and “secretly wearing green tights beneath his Dockers.” You’ve found Mr. “I’ll never grow up,” otherwise known as Peter Pan — someone who can handle the superficial issues life throws at him, but don’t dig too deep looking for a strong connection, commitment, or an equally mature partnership from him. Toxicity permeates the relationship when you’re the only one who stays grounded, spinning your wheels, and wondering why you can’t land him the way you’d hoped to while he flies off to Neverland again. He’s fun, but if you think that will translate into a long-term relationship, you’re only kidding yourself.

Related: Is he the wrong man for you?

2. El Cheapo Grande. You’ve met this cheap chap before, haven’t you? He’s the one who seems intent on getting together, so he asks you out — and then zeroes in on the cost of everything (and the value of nothing) throughout your date. His toxicity isn’t just a fixation on the financial aspects of dating, though. It’s a flawed character trait — his cheapness goes deep, straight to the core of who he is inside. He’s as stingy with genuine affection as he is with the dollars he doesn’t want to spend. He’ll make you feel inconsiderate, too — as if you’re some kind of greedy spendthrift intent on bankrupting him. But dating doesn’t require anyone to pay a small fortune; there are plenty of ways to enjoy a person’s company and treat someone special without breaking the bank. He just hasn’t learned that.

3. Mr. Egomaniac. He’s just so smart, isn’t he — and if you have any questions about just how brilliant he is, he’ll be the first person to happily remind you. And yes, he’s also confident, so there’s a good reason why you’re drawn to him initially. As educated and successful as he may be, he’s missing a normal person’s sensitivity and empathy chips — you know, the ones that actually make you consider other people’s feelings before you speak and take a genuine interest in their lives? He usually talks non-stop, as if “conversation” is just the waiting period he must endure while you’re speaking and he’s catching his breath before resuming his soliloquy. He’s a know-it-all who’s always right and willing to shoot you down to prove his point. You’ll sense the effects of his toxicity when you start to feel boring and worthless in his company. Recognize that his egomania has absolutely nothing to do with you — then run.

Related: Are you dating a player?

4. The Control Freak. At first, you might think: Oh, he’s attentive. That’s nice. Next thing you know, this emotional micromanager places every word and move of yours under the kind of intense scrutiny that’s more worthy of a panel evaluating Ph.D. candidates than a romantic tête-á-tête. You begin to second-guess yourself about everything from what to order for dinner (sugar is a no-no if he’s a health fanatic) to date-night entertainment (he’ll never embrace your movie choices) to interacting with his family and friends (he’ll tell you what to wear, say, and do without even blinking). Being under his thumb starts out cozily enough, but soon stifles every aspect of your individuality.

5. King of the (Eternally) Brokenhearted. His vulnerability seems appealing when he admits his attraction to you, but there’s also a distance there that you can’t quite put your finger on. He tells you that he broke up with a woman months or years earlier, and he’s still struggling to move forward emotionally. He expects lots of understanding from you, along with plenty of space and no pressure — you know, to speed up the healing process? But in fact, he’s still hung up on the woman (or more likely, women) he dated before you. You’ll never live up to or trump the ex(es). He wants you to fall for him (hey, he craves the attention!), so he’s sporadically charming while becoming increasingly distant, which makes you feel even more confused about your relationship status. A word to the wise: Speed through that state of confusion as if you’re flying down a highway toward a much better, less narcissistic destination.

Dave Singleton, an award-winning writer and columnist for Match.com since 2003, is the author of two books on dating and relationships. Visit his website, follow him on Twitter, or email him. 

How To Know When She’s Ready To Kiss You (And Eliminate Rejection)

You're about to learn, hands down, the best way to successfully get a girl to kiss you without fear of rejection.So if you've ever been afraid of getting rejected going for a kiss or you've gotten "the cheek", you know why having a rock-solid technique to moving in for the kiss is 100% crucial.

Our biggest fear? Rejection. Going in for the kiss is the worst place to face rejection in an interaction with a girl.

1) You've invested a lot of time by this point in the interaction, and there simply isn't enough time in your night to get this far and then hit a brick wall and have to move on.

2) Screwing up this part of the interaction can ruin all chances of moving on from here to seduction. Most guys don't have the chance to learn how to perfect going for a kiss because it happens so infrequently!

Here is the best way to avoid failure and shortcut right to success. Sounds good?

'The Kiss Technique' makes it so that when you're speaking to a woman, you can intentionally give off subconscious triggers that will make her think about kissing you! Pretty powerful stuff.

If you use this technique, suddenly making a woman want to kiss you will be something you have control over. If you decide to "wing it" in the stage like most guys, however, you're going to run into problems… First, you won't know how physically receptive she is to kissing you.

A tried and true rule to go by is this: Your hesitation = Her reservation. The more you hesitate, the worse your chances get, because she starts to build up all sorts of red flags and reservations. When you go to lean in for the kiss and youdon't do it the right way at the right time, you'll come off as needy (like you don't have a lot of options with women) because if you did have a lot of options, you wouldn't be worrying about the kiss with this girl.

So how do we show that you are absolutely not needy (even if you kind of feel like you are) and provide a way so that you will not fear rejection because you will know for sure ahead of time that she is wanting to kiss you?

The so-called 'Kiss Technique' involves combining two psychological concepts into a perfect recipe for mastering the kiss. The first concept is calledtriangular gazing. This will happen while you have built rapport and are looking to move into seduction. It involves looking from one eye to another, then looking at her mouth. When you start looking at her mouth, you will subconsciously start to think about kissing her, because this action is already anchored to the thought of kissing someone. Even if you look at a woman you're not attracted to and look at her mouth, you can start to think about kissing her, and you will become more attracted to her.

The good news is, the same happens for women. The even better news is, you can lead her to subconsciously start to do this and feel more attracted. How? By using the second half of the recipe, another psychological concept calledMirroring.

Whenever we are in conversation with someone, we will mirror the leader of the conversation in an attempt to build subconscious rapport with them.

When you perfectly combine triangular gazing and mirroring, you have a combination that will make her subconsciously think about kissing you.

After talking with her in rapport, start to look at her mouth. At first, only for 2 seconds, then look back to her eyes. Switch between her left and right eye, then back to her mouth for a few seconds longer. Continue to go from left to right eye and back to her mouth for 2 seconds, 3 seconds, then 5 seconds.

Eventually, you want to be mostly looking at her mouth. When she begins to look at your mouth as well, you know for sure that she's ready to kiss you. Voila!

The Kiss Technique takes all of the guess work out of "making a move". You will now know with confidence when she wants to kiss you, and get to be the fully assertive but perceptive man that women find irresistibly sexy. She will feel like you know exactly how to treat a woman and feel safe and confident moving on with you.

how men think in relationships

-Roach

WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE
NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE

THESE ARE OUR RULES!

PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!

0. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.

1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT'S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.

2. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.

3. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:

SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!
STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!
OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!
JUST SAY IT!

4. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.

5. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.

5. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.

6. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T ASK US.

7. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.

8. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH.
IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.

9. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.

10. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE...

11. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..
PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.

12. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.

13. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR..

14. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY.

15. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.

16. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.

17. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.

18. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!

19. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...

PASS THIS TO AS MANY MEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A LAUGH...

PASS THIS TO AS MANY WOMEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A BIGGER LAUGH, BECAUSE ITS TRUE!

10 Signs She Wants You To Ask Her Out

Sometimes it’s hard to know if a girl is sending you signals to ask her out, or if she is just friendly, or is actually obsessed with your friend, or what. But watch closely for these cues, because if she’s throwing them at you, it means she’s probably hoping you ask her out.

So just work up the courage to do it and do it. Godspeed!

1. She starts liking something random you like after you mentioned you liked it. Oh, what’s that? She likes Neko Case all of the sudden? Wowza, what a huge coincidence. She knows all about the Manchester United game even though two days ago she knew shit about soccer? Holy smokes. She knows all about the new Kid Cudi album that just dropped after you were just saying how excited you were about it? Yeah, these aren’t coincidences, so don’t overlook them. Don’t make her feel dumb by saying, “Oh please you said you hate soccer!”

Follow her lead. Let her brag about her new knowledge. Teach her something new. Plan a date around it. Because you’re definitely going to want to ask her out.

2. She touches your arm a lot. Sorry, it’s all we’ve got, guys. We want to touch you but many places seem off limits. Touching your face would make us feel like we are in a Hallmark commercial, touching your chest would make us feel like we were in a Lifetime movie, and touching your junk would make us feel like we were in a P0*no. Basically, that leaves the arm. So we touch it a lot if we are interested. If you can think of something better let us know.

3. She laughs at everything you say. Yeah, even when you aren’t really saying anything that funny. Sorry. It’s something we can’t help and we probably aren’t proud of. It’s not that we are faking it, we are just really giddy to be around you if we have a crush on you. So everything seems a little lighter, a little more fun, and a little more likely to make us bust our gut or snort or… I’m just not going to say it.

4. She keeps asking you to do the most odd, un-relationships things. If she keeps asking you to do non-date things, like going to weird comedy shows that are sort of far away or going to her brother’s baseball game or feeding the neighbor’s cat, she is doing the dance of doing absolutely everything except for asking you out on a real date. So why don’t you do everyone a favor and ask her out? You both will have a better time doing something other than working her hectic charity event or helping her move.


5. She sends you mail. Real mail. She had to get paper and a writing device — which are increasingly becoming hard to come by. She had to write with her handwriting, which she hardly does anymore. She put way more thought into her words since she wasn’t just shooting them out on her keyboard. And she licked and sealed the envelope. That is love. Or at least mega-like. Ask her out, for goodness sake.

6. She always wants to be in pictures with you. Are there a disproportionate amount of pictures of you with her than with other people? Especially guys? She wants be be part of your life. She wants to show you off. She wants you to remember her. She is inserting herself into your life in the only way she can without asking you out.

She has agreed to do anything you have suggested so far. If you’re asking her to do anything with a group of friends or anything non-datey, and you hardly have to finish the question “Do you want to go rock climb…” or “Do you want to grab a bee…” before she says yes, she’d rather be doing these things as your girlfriend.

Especially if she says it like it’s not even a question. Of course she will! With gusto, she’ll be there with bells on! She’s psyched about anything because you will be there.

8. She hasn’t mentioned any other guys in your presence. That’s because she’s not thinking of any other guys. And she won’t even bring up friend boys, because she doesn’t want you to assume they are boyfriends.

9. She brings you something when you’re sick or similarly cooks you anything ever. Yeah, she’s showing you her nurturing side. It’s not because she’s filling some gender role, she’s just seizing the opportunity to be sweet. It’s an easy in to make you a casserole or drop by with some ginger ale.

10. You have met her friends and they seem surprisingly psyched to meet you. They are already excited to see you and already know what you do because they have heard about you. In fact, they might be sick of you. They might be thinking, “Will you just ask her out already?” So go ahead and do it.

It Ends Tonight (Part 3)

…

People have spoken about fate but I have chosen not to believe it or even talk about it. However, today, fate is the only reason why I am sitting in the office of the wife of the man who made me lose everything. They say you keep your friends close and your enemies closer and that is exactly what I am going to do. I, Frank Ehinomen will be the perfect patient. I will answer whatever question she asks and do whatever she says.

“Good morning Mr Ehinomen” she says

“Good morning Dr. Adedoja” Frank replies gently

“Can I get you anything?” she presses further

“A glass of water will be good” Frank responds as he adjusts the sleeves of his shirt.

He could not help but notice the peach shaped bottom of his psychologist as she squats to get water from the dispenser. He feels a growing heat in his pants as she slowly came up from her squatting position. She hands him the glass of water and just as she is about to sit, the phone on her desk rings.

“That is my emergency line. I have to take this” Dr. Adedoja says to Frank.

He nods his approval and drinks out of the glass of water. He brings out his Blackberry to quickly respond to messages he might have from his friends.

“Oh my God !” she exclaims

Frank is scared and looks towards the desk as he sees her slump into the chair behind the desk. She is nodding her head as the person on the other end of the line continues talking.

“I will be there shortly. Thank you” she says as she concludes the phone call and drops the receiver.She walks towards Frank, trying her best to compose herself but he could still notices the fact that she is shaking allover.

“I am sorry we cannot have our session today. I have to attend to an emergency” she announced in her shaky voice.

“I hope you are ok?” Frank asks.

“Yes I am” Dr Adedoja replies quickly.

“Are you sure?” he probes further.

“I am fine, but could you do me a favour and drop me at the police station?” she says.

The firmness in her tone means she does not want to be quizzed further. Frank agrees to drop her at the police station because he is sure she cannot drive in her condition. She thanks him as they walk out of her office and she informs her receptionist to reschedule her other appointments for the day. They get to the police station and Frank drives in and park just to make things easy for her.

“Thank you Mr Ehinomen” says the doctor.

“You are welcome”. He responds, wondering why she is at the Police Station.

“I will call you and set up another session” she adds.

They shake hands as she opens the door and steps out of the car. Frank watches her as she walks into the police station with her hips swaying from side to side. He starts the engine of the car and turns the steering even as he continues staring at her, a loud bang and the sound of glass breaking brings him back to his senses. The occupant of the car he smashed into steps out of his car cursing out at him and fuming with anger. Frank steps out of the car to apologize to him only to find out it is him. The man whose car he smashed into is the man who made him lose everything. He is Mr Adedoja, his late fiancée’s boss.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Mr Adedoja is cursing at Frank who is still shocked to his marrow. He is standing about 20 feet from the man who has put him through pain. He could feel anger boiling in him and a storm of rage building up.

“Hey Mister, I am talking to you. Are you blind?” Mr Adedoja queries.

Suddenly, Frank charges forward, pushes Mr Adedoja to the ground, sits on his stomach and starts to punch him in the stomach and his face. Mr Adedoja swings his arms feebly like a woman as he tries to defend himself and Frank continues to pummel his face. The punches feel like a huge sack of stones thrown at his stomach and his face. He could only think of the number of broken ribs he is sure he is going to have as he had no strength to even shout out for help. Dr Adedoja looks back and sees the scene and screams for help from the police. Four Policemen run out and they grab Frank off the body of Mr Adedoja.

Dr. Adedoja who had followed the policemen as they ran out kneels by the body of her husband. His face is swollen and in blood,she screams at Frank who the police have pushed to the ground and put handcuffs on.

“What has he done to you?” Dr Adedoja asks through her tears.

“He has done a lot.” Frank mutters through clenched teeth.

Mr Adedoja tries to speak, but his wife asks him not to. An ambulance arrives and the paramedics put Mr Adedoja on a stretcher and put him in the ambulance.

“Madam, your pikin still dey here” an officer says to Dr. Adedoja.

“Dem bring am here with him other friends for attempted arson” the officer continues.

“You no go bail am?” another officer asks her.

Frank could see the confusion on her face as she could not decide who to attend to first. Her husband or her child. The officers walk Frank into the station as Dr. Adedoja asks an officer to please take her the hospital.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Frank having spent the last 10 days in police custody could not help but wonder how many days he has left to spend in police custody. The past 10 days have been gruesome, the mosquitoes in the 6 by 6 cell had feast endlessly on his body,the offensive odour of ammonia from other cells and his,the cold floor he has been sleeping on all seem like it worth it, as he is sure Mr Adedoja must have a broken nose, couple of broken ribs and a difficult time chewing food.

Mr Adedoja is in pains but still alive at least for now. An officer comes to open the cell and places handcuffs on Frank as he ushers him out of the cell in the same boxers he has had on for the last 10 days. The officer opens the door to an interrogation room and as Frank walks in, he sees Mr and Dr. Adedoja sitting.

Mr Adedoja has a plaster on his nose and his lips have stitches on them. Frank smiles as he sees this. He feels contented but not satisfied. The officer cuffs his hands behind the chair as he tells the couple they have just 15 minutes to spend. They nod in agreement as he leaves the room.

“Good Morning Mr Ehinomen” Dr. Adedoja says.

“Drop the formality outside and call me Frank” he replies with his eyes stone cold.

“Ok. How have you been?” she adds.

“Why not cut to the chase and tell me why you are  here” Frank says to the couple impatiently.

“Why did you attack me?” Mr Adedoja asks.

Frank laughs hysterically before replying “are you serious?”
“Yes I am” Mr Adedoja replies.

“Do you remember your late surbodinate, Miss Bankole?” Franks asks Mr Adedoja.

“Yes I do. I remember Bimbo” he replies

“She was my fiancée and you were having an affair with her before she died”

“Oh my God!” Dr. Adedoja exclaims.

Mr Adedoja is shell shocked at Franks’s revelation but goes to defend himself  “I was not having an affair with her”

“What were you then doing with her?” Frank shouts in anger.

The shout attracts the officer outside and he walks into the room asking them to calm down or he will take Frank back.

“I was not doing anything with her” Mr Adedoja says in with his voice as firm as it could be.

Frank tries to wriggle free from the chair but he cannot. He just wants to strangle him.”You cannot even admit that you were having an affair with her is that how much you do not respect her memory?” Frank says has his voice goes up 10 decibels. The officer comes back in to take Frank back as it had become obvious they could not keep their calm. He tries to uncuff Frank from the chair who is shouting and making threats at Mr Adedoja.

Mr Adedoja who refuses to be intimidated  starts shouting back at Frank, claiming his threats are empty and he will make sure he rots in jail.

“I am going to kill you” Frank says just as the officer cuffs him and is about taking him back.

Mr Adedoja screams back at him “Let’s see how you will do that when I let you in rot in jail”

The officer is about to open the door when Dr. Adedoja stops him.

“Madam, wetin?” the officer asks.

“I just have to say something before you take him back” she says.

This gets both Frank and her husband’s attention. They are eager to find out what she has to say.

“Frank,your fiancée Bimbo………”

“Yes, what about her” Frank cuts in.

“She was my lover”.

THE END

She’s Faking It! Here’s How You Can Tell

…

So you as a guy just got done with a heavy weight “wrestling” match in the bedroom, and are feeling like King Kong cos the whole time you girl was shouting and screaming and calling you “Daddy”, and telling you “not to stop”. After X minutes, you’re done, and you roll over thinking “Damn I’m good.” Of course after telling you that “Oh baby that was good. I came multiple times” All is good in your world except, in her mind she’s thinking “This boy is thinking he has done something serious… *hiss*“

A lot of times, you guys have no idea when a girl actually has an O, and when she’s faking it and telling you stories of the sky falling when it was happening.

Here are some signs of how you can tell she’s faking it:

1. Heavy Breathing

Unless she has lungs of steel, the intensity of the Big O should make anyone breath heavily. If it’s the real deal, then it should be almost impossible for her to keep her regular breathing pattern. So if you’re done and she’s just breathing normally, then she is most likely faking it OR she’s Wonder Woman, which in that case she can get one herself.

2.  Back to your regular scheduled program

So you guys are done, and 5 mins later she’s back to knitting, or finishing up her project. Yeah, something is not right. Actually this is one of the quickest ways to know. After the Big O, she’ll need to rest and relax for a certain period for regain that energy expended. If she’s back to her regular scheduled program in a few, then she’s faking it.

3. Oscar Nominee Performance

Yea Yea Yea, we all know sex can be intense and all, but if she’s turned into an adult film actress (yea they fake it) then she’s probably faking it. The excessive screaming, shouting, ‘spank me(s)’, etc most times are fake. Not saying she’ll be lying there like a log of wood, but if it’s excessive then it’s fake. Faking it during the act itself, in turn means she’s going to fake the finale. So there, pretty easy to detect this.

4. Temperature Rising.

Another easy way to know if she’s faking it is if her body temperature doesn’t rise. After the O, the temperature always rises because of the intensity. It’s biological. Now unless she’s a cold-blooded animal, you should expect her body to a bit warm.

5. Sweaty

This is pretty self explanatory. The sweat has to be showing if you’ve both done some work. Even if the AC is on full blast, the skin gotta be a bit sweaty. It can’t be as dry as you started off with. If the climax did in fact happen, the blood pressure, high level of tension, and increased heart rate will induce some sweating.

6. Dilated Pupils

This is pretty difficult to catch because 1. it might be dark, 2. it’s kinda creepy looking into her pupils to see if she had an O. But if you’re able to pull it off, then it’ll be ultimate sign of whether it happened or not.

7. Muscle Contractions

This is another one that’s hard to fake but you have to be a bit attentive to catch it. During an O, the muscles down there involuntarily contract, so it feels like your magic stick is being gripped. It’s pretty obvious when you feel it. However it’s worth noting that some women has the special skill of controlling it for pleasure, but it’s definitely a sure sign of if she’s faking it or not.

.

So there you have it. 7 ways to know if/when she’s faked the deal. There’s actually more, like she’s an actor, or she’s done before you, but we wont go into all that.

Bottom line is, a lot of faking is going on, and as a woman my small civic duty is to at least let some secrets out of the bag, and help men know when their wives, gfs, one night stands are faking it. You never know, I might be saving a marriage or 2. I mean 48% of women fake it, and I’m sure out of that 48% some just don’t know how to get one (we’ll get to that another time), and fake it by default.

So with this list, you can ensure she’s doesn’t fake it again, and maybe, just maybe you can help her get hers on the regular.

Peace, Love & Multiple Os.

What To Do When She Tells You She Does Not Love You Back

…

Have you ever known a girl you felt is the right woman for you? Everything seems perfect, except for one thing, she does not feel the same way you do and she wastes no time in telling it to you? well, I would be letting you know how to handle this kind of situation if you are in one or you ever find yourself in one in the future.

You see, women have far more insecurities than men do and so they intelligently let their systems adapt to these insecurities by creating defense mechanisms to protect themselves from our world’s many insecurities. Having said this, it is quite possible that this woman you have feelings for could be playing a game, ‘testing’ on you in some way, building herself into some sort of challenge and making you fight for her, or she could honestly and candidly not share your feelings and is not the type that beats around the bush but maybe, still enjoys your friendship. However the case may be, the best decision you can make for yourself is to walk away.

Huh? Did you hear me say “walk away”?

No bro, you want me to send it to your email address?

Of course, you should walk away. Say a huge ‘NO’ to her friendship proposal and move on with your life. She obviously likes you, for her to still want to be your friend and I bet the reason is ‘cuz she thinks you are a really ‘nice’ guy but you have to remind yourself that you are the man and as the man, you make the rules (at least I think so). Personally, I think being ‘friends’ with a woman you are attracted to does more harm than good, if it does any good at all. It puts her in control and trust me, women don’t like to be in control, I mean, they crave authority especially if  it is over a man, but a woman can hardly stand a man she can control. More so, staying away gives her the opportunity to ‘miss you’.

No, no, no, no, don’t get me wrong, I am not saying you should not follow your heart or whatever phrase you described being friend-zoned by the woman you have feelings for, I am just saying that you should look at your options, critically. Weigh them… Learn their benefits and consequences, then, my dear friend, you are good to go.

A wise man wrote in a book, ” Use your absence to increase respect and honor”. think about it. *wink*

5 Signs That Your Girlfriend Used To Be The Queen Of Ashawos (Prostitute)

The discussion of past intimate partners can be a topic that is often avoided when starting a new relationship. Women who are open and free-spirited about their sexuality are among us, and while most men say they want a woman with someexperience, they don’t want to feel like she’s got more miles on her then his SUV. So, if you' re getting the feeling that your new girlfriend has been around, here are 5 signs to look for to determine if the "sweet and innocent" woman you are with used to be the kind of girl guys thought of as a "sure thing."


1. She's unusually savvy in bed
Love-making should be good and you do have women that have developed a marvelous sense of their sexual self from only a couple of partners and/or long-term relationships. However, if you’re with a girl and she does a move that is just toogood, that quality for her may have come as a result of having made more than just a few trips around the bases.


2. She personally knows a lot of guys
It's not unusual for a woman to have a guy friend; however, it is not common to be constantly bumping into guys who your girlfriend knows and has obviously been intimate with. For example, the two of you go out and she says to you, “Hey wait, let me say hi to my friend Greg.” Another set of guys walk in. “Those are my friends John, Matt and Todd. I have to go say hi to them.” Another set walks in and she continues to know all the guys.

The guys appear comfortable speaking to both of you, or know her immediately by her name, or even know her but can't recall her name for some reason. Their conversation will be short, awkward and painful to experience. As you leave, the guys will look at you in a way that signals “We’ve already had your girl.” Afterwards your girlfriend will swiftly explain that “they're just old friends” and change the conversation.


3. She makes love as if on auto-pilot
Have you felt all romantic after a late-night romp with your current girlfriend, but she was left untouched by the experience? If she is too mechanical, the dirty talk is flaccid with phony excitement, she wants to please herself, or please you and then be done with it, or seldom has interest in cuddling or the like, it is a good indication that you are one in a long line and she's had her fair share.


4. She knows a lot about condoms
It's a great thing for women to protect themselves. We're talking about the girls that know just a little too much about condoms and say things like: “That brand has a higher risk of breaking”, or “don’t flush it because condoms clog my toilet.”


5. She routinely gets tested
An obvious sign that she's been around in the past and has likely been with various partners is that she routinely gets tested for sexually-transmitted diseases.

If you discover that your girlfriend has been around in the past, don't jump to conclusions. Ask her about the relationships, listen carefully to her tales and decide if there is a double standard in regards to the amount of women that you've been with. If she's has had many partners in the past, but loves you, treats you right and wants to engage in a serious relationship, should it really matter?

4 Signs That She'll Break Your Heart

At the start of a new relationship, it's easy to overlook the clear cut signs that she’ll break your heart because of genuine attraction, excitement or just the fact you’re getting some action. However, with the majority of relationships destined for failure, you need to be selective and end a sour one before too much of your time and energy has been invested. For your benefit, here are 4 signs that she’ll break your heart.


1. She was already involved when she met you
The two of you hooked up when she was dating another guy or even worse--you're dating a married woman. While it can be easy to discount logic and naysayers when you're head-over-heels in love, but sooner or later you'll realize that you'll never be able to fully trust her. After all, how do you know she wouldn't start dating someone else? A cheat is always a cheat.


2. She's close with her exes
If you meet a girl that is able to stay good friends with her exes and gets a lot of calls from a lot of guys who all seem very close to her, she'll damage you. She may have some "friends with benefits" things going on with her exes, and the fact that she finds men so disposable means that she never really builds up strong relationships anyway. If you're looking for a serious relationship, never get involved with a girl who easily switches from viewing as lovers to treating them as friends.


3. She has deep-rooted issues
Whether it's problems with alcohol, drugs, or psychological issues, if there's something in her life that you’re always second place to, this relationship is not going to last long.


4. She's very secretive and lies a lot
If your girl isn't big on telling the truth, doesn't feel guilt over her constant lies, does whatever is "easiest" to get by rather than dealing with the truth and simply tells you what you want to hear, you should end it sooner rather than later.

8 Things Women Don’t Want To Hear In Bed

1. “My ex used to love it when I…”
Talking about your prior séxual encounters is a deal breaker for a lot of of women. She doesn’t need to hear about it, and if you bring it up, she’ll feel threatened and jealous.

2. Another woman’s name
Yes, she knows you have had intimate moments with other women, but every woman wants to think she is the only one. If you make this huge mistake, be extremely apologetic and be prepared to do whatever it takes to prove to her that she’s the most beautiful, intelligent and sexiest woman you have ever met.

3. “Shh! Can you be quiet?”
Do you really want her to quiet down after she’s turned up the volume to let you know how good it feels or that you’re just totally blowing her mind?

4. “Who’s your daddy?”
When a woman is getting it on with you, it’s a total turnoff to hear a creepy cliché that instantly makes her think of her dear old dad.

5. “We’d better hurry, I have to be out of here by 9:00.”
Telling a woman that you’re in a rush and that you don’t have much time to work with is a major mood-killer. Furthermore, making a such a flippant comment followed by a mad scramble for your boxer shorts is sure to freak women out.

6. “Well, that was fun.”
When a woman sleeps with you for the first time, she can’t help but wonder if she’s just another notch on your bedpost. Making deflating comments such as, “thank you,” or “that was fun” means that you just had a séxual transaction (a hookup) and not an emotional connection.

7. “You’re almost as good as my last girlfriend.”
Every woman wants to think she is great in bed. Making a statement like this will blow her mind out of control and bring up certain questions, like, “Do you think about her while you are having séx with me?” and “Do you wish you were with her?”

8. “Do you smell something funny?”
All girls have a distinct odor, and unless she has some sort of infection the smell is probably not a ‘bad’ smell. Women tend to be very self-conscious about their ‘smell’ and the only thing you will accomplish by telling her that she stinks is destroy her self esteem.