We’ve all been there: Sleeping with a seemingly great guy
whose motives we can’t seem to figure out. Maybe he’s giving mixed signals or
no signals at all. Either way, something in us makes us wonder if he’s in it
just for sex. Well your first clue, should be your trusty gut, but maybe your
gut isn’t so trusty because it is wrapped up in insecurity. In that case, here
are eight more clues that may help you solve the mystery of whether your lover
is interested in you as more than just a bedmate.
WARNING: The truth of these clues may sting, but better to
know where you stand, than to lay down for too long with the wrong guy, right?
1. Weekday lovers
If your guy seems to always be MIA during the weekends, this
is a clear sign that he is reserving weekends for someone else on his literal
to-do list, or keeping his options open to meet other women. “When a girl is
just a girl I’m into for sex, I’ll never ask her out on a weekend. Weekends are
strictly reserved for A-listers and new opportunities.” – Mike, 27, Chicago
2. Sporadic contact
A guy who is really into you will communicate regularly. A
guy who is in it to sex it, calls, texts, emails and pops-over only when he is
feeling frisky and knows that you will indulge his desires. If the sight of
your man’s name on your caller ID surprises you, chances are, this is a sex
only situation.
3. Invitation to nowhere
He never invites you to go out with him – his friend’s
birthday party, his work happy hour, not even a lackluster dinner and a movie.
Bottom line: “Dates” are always cozy nights in. Why? Because that is the
easiest place to, you guessed it… have sex.
4. Time’s up!
You spend just enough time together for a little foreplay,
sex and maybe a nap. Unless there’s time and desire for a round two, a sex-only
motivated man will bolt like a thief in the night before you even have time to
turn over on his side.
5. Late-night lovers
A sure in-it-for-the-sex-only sign is when your man only
reaches out to you after hours, also known as a “booty-call”, when the day is
done and quite possibly last call has been shouted. Although he coos for you
sweetly on the other end of the phone, perhaps begging for your hot body, just
know that you might be on a long list of lovelies, any of one of whom can
satisfy his sexual cravings for the evening.
6. Tangoless texts
The sex-only guy is remorseless when it comes to leaving
your texts unresponded to for hours – even days – and sometimes doesn’t respond
at all… unless of course you are reaching out to setup a boudoir appointment.
And in that case if his RSVP his positive, his reply back is immediate. Same
goes for phone calls, emails, Facebook messages, tweets or any other form of
communication.
7. Sexy speak
You two speak one language: Sex. And that’s it. If you think
hard about it, you may know everything about how he likes “it” but you have no
clue where his parents live, what he wanted to be when he grew up, the food
that makes him gag, and if he has a middle name. There’s lots of moaning and
groaning, but no chatter about work, family, friends, problems, triumphs, etc.
Sam, 31, of New York says, “A woman who presents herself as a sexual showpiece
will be treated that way. Come to the table at the very beginning with more
than just the ability to blow me away in the bedroom. Blow away my mind too and
that way I’ll consider you relationship worthy. You don’t have to play like a
virgin, you just need to offer more than T&A.”
8. Listen from the beginning
He told you straight up that he doesn’t want a girlfriend,
doesn’t have time for a girlfriend, can’t deal with a girlfriend… and just
wants to have casual fun. It is up to you if you want to listen… but remember,
most guys don’t want to deliver news that women don’t want to hear unless they
really mean it. Justin, 24 from Oakland says, “Know who you are and be in charge
of what you want from the beginning. If you leave it up to me, then I’m
probably going to go for what is easiest… and that’s never a relationship.
No comments:
Post a Comment