Sunday, November 11, 2012

How important is Race/Nationality/ ethnic groups in Marriage


Marriage is hard no doubt, and there is not magic trick to having a perfect everlasting married life. I can’t say too much about marriage since I myself am not married. However, I’ve seen enough from the outside looking in to know that it’s not an easy road. A lot of times some of us try to weed out potential complications in our marriage by sticking to our  country men , religious, financial or social circles when looking for a life partner. My dad would tell me  “why go and give yourself extra problem  by marrying a Muslim from Turkey   when you’re a christian from  Egypt ? Which religion will your kids follow? How will you cope with her family and your cultural differences?” It’s a very understandable argument, but my reply most times refers to married couples that we both know, from the same country  that ended up not working out due to some issue or another.
These days talking to friends and associates, it seems to come up quite often. “ Asian  people do this”, “ Africans   are this”, “Latinos  are that”, and all that stuff, but do we really believe those things, or are these stereotypes that have been fed into our brains from childhood by parents, relatives and others in our community? Regardless of the answer, it is an interesting and important factor that governs most people’s decisions on a life partner, esp we africans, due to our close knit community, and family oriented lifestyle.
With all that being said, I ask the question – How important is Race/Nationality/Tribe in Marriage? Is your decision not to marry from a particular cultural background (or outside your background) influenced by your parents, or your community? Or is this solely a personal decision? Is cultural background insignificant in your decision?
 I’ve love to hear your thoughts, and concerns.

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